An interview with myself

Because I can. And no one else will..at least not yet.

—

Me: So, you’ve been wanting to be interviewed for a while now. Why not just get someone else to do it?

Myself: I guess I could have done that but its a bit more interesting this way.

Me: Eh, I guess. But onward we go. Let us start simply. Where are you from?

Myself: I remember once I went to work with my mom one day. I was maybe about 10. She was a teacher and at the time teaching at an elementary school on the near north side of Chicago. One of her students, named Tracy, asked me this same question, “Where are you from?” and my question to her was well what do you mean. She repeated herself again and this qualified it with some sentence which indicated that she didn’t believe I was just a black girl, that I had to be, based on my looks I guess, from somewhere other than just Chicago. It was the first time that I had been confronted with the possibility that I looked like I could be from somewhere other than the south side of Chicago. I don’t remember how the exchange continued but knowing me I am sure I made it utterly clear that I was a black girl from the south side of Chicago.

Me: Why not just say you’re from Chicago?

Myself: I do occasionally but sometimes you need to be able to make people clear on where you’re from. And you also occasionally want to rep your hood. Generally when I say “I’m a black girl from the south side of Chicago” most other urbanites be they Chicagoans or not, get it. And for those that don’t then I just qualify my statement.

Me: Qualify, how?

Myself: Well for example, when I first moved to NYC in 2001 I lived in Harlem and near the border of Washington Heights. When my hair was long and straight I was often mistaken for some manner of Latina and if I happened to speak spanish I had to convince people I wasn’t Dominican or Panamanian. All of that is all fine and dandy but its speaks volumes about people’s proclivity to choose nationality over race especially when the racial options are black and white and they are clearly not white and clearly have no interest in being black. So, when qualifying my statement I would say something like “Well I am a black girl from the south side of chicago. If you say you’re black, you’re black none of this ‘I’m dominican.’ or ‘I’m Puerto Rican’., you’re black and that’s it.”

Me: Sounds a bit harsh or judgmental don’t you think?

Myself: Judgmental certainly but it doesn’t mean I am not right or rather that the interpretation of color and thus race in Chicago isn’t a valid one.

Me: I see. Moving right along. You said you speak Spanish. Do you speak any other languages?

Myself: I speak Spanish and Portuguese generally rather fluently though my Portuguese is the stronger of the two. I speak French as well but only good enough to read the paper and make love. HA!

Me: Why?

Myself: Why not? Knowing other languages opens up your world. The fact of being able to communicate with a person in their languages mean you gain their trust and you can dig a bit deeper. With French, eh, well I was in this relationship with a French national and French people refuse to speak English, though they know it pretty well generally, so I just went ahead and learned it. Horizontal learning I think its called.

Me: So you learned French for a man?

Myself: Yea. And?

Me: I am just asking.

Myself: Ask something else.

Me: Uhhhh ok. Well what kind of work do you do?

Myself: Its utterly unimportant what I do since its not what I really want to do.

Me: Well then what do you really want to do?

Myself: write and think and get paid for it. In more sophisticated terms, I want to be an ethnographer and social entrepreneur. I like to write, research, engage and observe. I’d like to build and support businesses which use this methodology and are informed by social and sociological theory. I think. I haven’t quite worked out the part about social and sociological theory part yet. I am reading Bourdieu’s collection of essays on Cultural Production and am utterly excited about what his thinking means for the modern-day cultural production particularly as it relates to music and other art forms produced by historically marginalized people. Sort of sounds like I should get a PhD. I am semi-loosely considering it though I feel like I could do this on a freelance basis on my own. Who knows really but this is what I want to do.

Me: Quite interesting. And The Netherlands?

Myself: I struggle here. Most of it is cultural. I read this article in a Dutch newspaper which discussed the Dutch myth of innocence and I really have to degree. Dutch society lacks serious, critical self-reflection. The result is a complete and total denial of the root causes of the issues in their society much of which have to do with their own involvement. I believe this is how it has been possible for someone as ridiculous and bigoted as Geert Wilders to gain ground. While his opinions certainly don’t represent the majority of Dutch people, I’d be curious to know how much further to the right his ideas are from the average Dutch person’s.

Me: And Sinterklaas?

Myself: You would ask me about that shit. It is, in essence among the most racist cultural manifestations I have seen anywhere. What is most insulting is that intelligent, university educated Dutch people accept its continued practice without realizing that it normalizes oppression of blacks in this country. I have a friend who grew up here who when she was a child was called Zwarte Piet by a white Dutch child younger than her. She was offended and approached the child’s mother explaining how offensive and racist this was and the mother told her that she misunderstood and that she shouldn’t be so sensitive. For me what is most difficult is that Blacks here haven’t unified and risen up in protest about this.

Me: So why do you stay if these things bother you so much?

Myself: Good question. I have a good job with intelligent colleagues whom I respect in a stimulating environment. I have a work life balance which I will never have anywhere else, certainly not in the US. I am also trying to give it a chance. Long term The Netherlands is not for me but it may turn out to be Ok for the short-term.

Me: How do you manage being here by yourself?

Myself: I don’t always, really. I do have great friends here but my closest girlfriends are in relationships and I am not which makes our lives different in some respects. I spend a lot of time by myself which is good and not so much at the same time. It just is what it is. I have nearly resolved that dating someone while I am here is/will be virtually impossible.

Me: But weren’t you dating someone here though?

Myself: You’re pushing your luck.

Me: But I am almost positive I heard you were dating some African?

Myself: You and this alleged African I was dating can kiss my ass twice.

Me: So its true? Was it an ugly breakup?

Myself: A break up can only be ugly if there was something to break up, namely a relationship, in the first place. Since there wasn’t, it didn’t happen.

Me: I see.

Myself: You should drop this.

Me: You should tell the truth.

Myself: You should ask me a different question if you want this interview to continue.

Me: Geez, touchy touchy. Just a few more less sensitive inquiries. Favorite color?

Myself: Purple

Me: Favorite curse word.

Myself: Motherfucker.

Me: Favorite cities.

Myself: New York, São Paulo, Paris

Me: Favorite language.

Myself: Brazilian portuguese.

Me: Favorite author.

Myself: James Baldwin.

Me: Favorite song.

Myself: Coltrane’s “In a sentimental mood.”

Me: How do you like your wine?

Myself: Dry.

Me: Your men.

Myself: Generally black men of the Haitian or West and Central African variety. But I am currently striking against the whole of Sub-Saharan Africa.

Me: Why?

Myself: Anymore questions?

Me: Favorite thing about The Netherlands.

Myself: Being able to ride my bike everywhere oh and the OV Chipkaart. Also all apple products and oud kaas.

Me: Favorite thing about New York.

Myself: Brooklyn and my God family.

Me: What do you want most of all right now?

Myself: for this year to be over, for my life to be easier in 2010 than it was in 2009.

Me: Thanks much.

Myself: Indeed.

A comprehensive review on “Precious” (no I didn’t write it)

I have been hesitant to make any sort of dedicated commentary on the film Precious mainly because I have yet to see the film and also because I am certain that my response to the movie after I actually see it will only be a more intense version of my response to the reviews of the film thus far.  That said I have just read a review today, forwarded to me by my mom, which is what I believe to be the most comprehensive review of the film and really gets to the gut of the issues that this film and everyone associated with it have thrust in our faces.

I will see the movie in 10 days time with two American friends in The Netherlands.  This will be interesting and I will be bracing myself.  In the meanwhile, I invite and implore you to read this review.  To be fair, it is long, in 3 parts actually.

Precious Review, Part 1

Precious Review, Part 2

Precious Review, Part 3

Let me know what you think.

Cheers.

Strictly roots, poppin plenty style

I am in a good mood which means I am gonna blather on a lot.  Why, do you ask, am I in a good mood?  Well, A. this goddamn piece of shit year is almost over, B. it’s sunny in The Hague, JAH BLESS, B. I am cooking up some sumptuous sides for tonight’s belated Thanksgiving with the homies and C. cause I am going to introduce you, my dearest readers,  to two of my favorite people ever–Brother Mo and Mama Amal!

They are cooler than you and me (like for real) and are current on all things hip, sexy, trendy and generally interesting so that social misfits like myself can read Bourdieu and watch Grey’s Anatomy reruns.  They have rehashed their blogs with fresh but simple layouts and intriguing content.  Get ye to thy Google and type in Ask Waryaa and/or My Name Is Amal and feast thine eyes lest you end up with a dead fish wrapped in brown paper on your keyboard (© The Godfather) Tannie Negarra told you first!

Oh and before I end, I have to leave you with this little YouTube diddy.  I listen to Radio Nova, like a lot, and one day while at work this rootsy tune came on.  So of course I broke out the trusty iPhone and scanned it with Shazam only to find out that its Uptown Top Rankin by Althea & Donna!  Clearly who the hell knows who they are but the point is that the song is a groovy little ditty and I can do fun dances to and pretend I am a Rasta.

Happy Saturday kiddos!

And on the last Thursday of November, God gave us Thanksgiving

If it were a week from today and I was in the US I’d be licking my chops over leftover turkey, sweet potato custard, macaroni and cheese, greens, salad, stuffing and cranberry sauce.  Alas, I am in The Netherlands for Thanksgiving and my best pal Adam and I are heatin’ up the kitchen.  In the name of American cultural hegemony we will then heave copious amounts of American Thanksgiving fare down the throats of three beloved S. Africans while they squirt incessant amounts of good vino down ours. Remember boys and girls, Thanksgiving is about giving and Tannie Negarra told you first.

I have been assigned the duty of side dishes of which I am making two.  One will be a recipe I initially found on Foodnetwork.com by our favorite N’awlins chef Emeril Lagasse and its a Four Cheese Macaroni and Cheese.  Now the first time I made this I wasn’t so sure as I totally overdid it on the flour necessary to make the roux but the second time I made it, I got it just right and let me tell you how I ate the entire casserole dish by myself.  So the mac n cheese is a must.

But you can’t just have one side dish.  The table must be filled to the brim with food and drink of all sorts.  That said, I am having quite a bit of trouble deciding on the second side dish.  It needs to be a green in light of the tryptophan, carbohydrate combo situation happening here.  But which green?  I need your help dear readers.  Here are the options below (click on links for pictures and recipes):

1. Cauliflower

2. Brussel Sprouts and chestnuts in brown butter

3. Green beans with caramelized onions and almonds

4. Sautéed green beans and mushrooms

Please respond indicating your preference and why.

Thanks guys!

The oddest things happen while window shopping in The Hague

So yesterday when the sun revealed itself I said to myself that I would take advantage of the day and be out and about.  So I did.  Yesterday being the grand opening of Jimmy Choo at H&M, I decided to stop by and see if there was anything worth punishing the plastic for.  As I presumed, most of the stuff had been picked over and it looked as grim as the gobbler by about 8 pm Thanksgiving eve.  In any event, the few remnants I did see were nice but not enough to pummel the plastic.  Unfortunate for moi, as I was circling the Jimmy Choo area, trying to get by a group of Dutch shoppers, I became the victim of a near be-heading by a rather large framed picture which made its Hollywood descent upon my left frontal lobe.  The result of which was the immediate and exponential growth of a painful lump on my head.  I, being extremely shaken up found the nearest customer service person and explained to them that I needed to see a manager as a result of the aforementioned incident.  Face streaming with tears, growing lump on head, I was rushed upstairs to the employee lounge where I proceeded to be the subject of several conversations in Dutch about the meisje who got hurt downstairs.  I explained easily 5 times what happened and was attended to by at least 3 people over the course of about an hour.  One of whom was the lovely Sander, general manager of the H&M located at Wagenstraat 15 in The Hague.  After I’d drank 3 cups of water and taken a paracetamol, Sander and I had a pleasant convo about me  moving to and living in The Netherlands, the previous designer collaborations with H&M and the length of the line that morning specifically for Jimmy Choo (apparently people had been lined up since 4:30 am yesterday morning).  He was kind enough to present me with a 20 Euro gift card, which while not much (Sanders words, my thoughts exactly) is a token of goodwill towards the customer who was nearly decapitated on your watch.  Sander made me promise him that if I started to feel dizzy that I would come back and hang out in the employee lounge.  Luckily for me the only result of yesterday’s near blackout experience is the lump, that has gotten smaller, on my head.  Thanks to Sander, what could have been a major blow to my mood and self-esteem, turned out to be A-ok.  Thanks Sander, YOU ROCK!

Next stop was to walk around the shopping district to see if there were any other stores in which to spend my money.  Alas, my attempts to pump my hard-earned euros into the Dutch retail economy were thwarted at every turn.  I meandered into Mango, COS (which apparently is owned by H&M, see this blog for more info) and also into Vanillia all of which generally have stuff I like though to be fair I have only been lucky in Mango during this summer’s 5 day jaunt in Malta.  I mean there were nice things but nothing that shouted “BUY ME! BUY ME!”  That said in I went and out I came empty handed.

My next stop was de Bijenkorf, the equivalent of Marshall Field’s in Chicago, but not really.  I hate to sound trite but my heart sunk when Marshall Field’s closed and was replaced with Macy’s.  Marshall Field’s had class world-class service, a wide range of clothing for all styles and a Christmas window that rivaled those of Printemps in Paris.  It was and is a Chicago icon.  Macy’s is nothing similar and I refuse to shop there when in Chicago. However back to de Bijenkorf,  to its credit, it is a proper department store though it will never rival Galeries Lafayette, Saks Fifth Avenue, Neiman Marcus or Le Bon Marché.  The main floor is of course cosmetics, perfume, jewelry and other accessories and certain men’s items.  FYI for all you craving MAC Cosmetics in The Hague, the MAC counter will be opening up on November 25 and I’ll be there to purchase two lipsticks.  I was, oddly enough, or maybe not, very impressed with the lingerie, hosiery and housewares section.  Now I know where to go.

While in de Bijenkorf I witnessed a fight among about seven women who were screaming and scratching and appeared to be trying to kill each other.  I am not exaggerating.  The oldest of the women had a massive bloody scratch on her face.  The other group of three apparently had got it in their head to beat this woman down in front of her children.  My mind reels at the thought of what the Dutch onlookers may have been thinking.  The irony of it all was the massive blow up doll of Zwarte Piet hanging from the ceiling.

Eh.  Rainy Saturdays.  Let me tell you.

15 x 15, Celebrating 15 Years of NARS Cosmetics

This morning I opened my inbox and much to my delight I found an email me informing me of NARS’ 15 x 15 project which is,  like everything NARS does, absolutely amazing.  This is the combination of a book, art, photographs and make-up to celebrate the 15 years since François Nars first introduced us to the wonders of his imagination, the fruits of which are conceived through his cosmetics line.  And as if all of this wasn’t enough the proceeds from the project go to a variety of non-profit and charity organizations.

Edgy, stunning, shocking and glamorous as ever.  HAPPY ANNIVERSARY NARS!!

Haikus cause I am (getting) over you

A four week affair

and in 2 weeks we were done.

Why, did you bother?

—

Being grown-up means

deciding what’s in your best

interest…and mine.

—

A lot of talk when

you knew you couldn’t offer

me the real McCoy

—

May God protect those

children with fools and tufthunters

in place of parents.

When Fox News fails you. . .

. . .there are a few remaining strongholds of quality, ethical, news outlets in the United States.  Yes, really.  I was a fortunate enough to have a parent who insisted on pooling her news from a range of sources rather than the easy option which was flipping on the TV and watching the evening news.  This is not to completely bash network news but the breadth of quality news programs has decreased significantly and I can only name two such network news programs which have not compromised quality and ethical reporting: 60 Minutes and CBS Sunday Morning. (if I am missing anything please let me know)  That said where does the discriminating critical thinking American (or expat in the US) get their news? PUBLIC TV AND PUBLIC RADIO!  I was raised on the stuff and let me tell you it does not disappoint.

Rather than sing the praises of these radio and tv networks I will simply provide you with the information so you can go forth and listen to quality radio and TV.

1. American Public Media: This network I only came across as of today but it was as a result of a my trying in earnest to remember the name of this radio program I used to listen to on WBEZ Chicago Public Radio as a child.  I finally remembered the name of the program, A Prairie Home Companion, and was delighted to find out that it was connected to yet another public media outlet about which I had yet to learn.  As it turns out, this network produces an array of shows I’d been accustomed to listening to via WBEZ and then WNYC New York Public Radio and WBGO among them A Prairie Home Companion and The Marketplace series.

2. National Public Radio (NPR): This network has been my bread and butter since I was old enough to detect audible sound.  I believe it has radio stations in almost, if not all of the 50 states.  As mentioned above, NPR via is various local radio stations broadcasts a variety of programs from originally produced by other independent news networks.

3. Public Broadcasting Service (PBS): This is the television equivalent of National Public Radio.  As diverse in its visual programing options as his radio counterpart and for me personally it was my introduction at a very young age to the best of British television.  Shows such as: Upstairs, Downstairs; Are You Being Served?; Mr. Bean; Keeping Up Appearances; Hercule Poirot; every BBC production of Jane Austen’s books; Prime Suspect.  I shan’t go on as I am sure you get the point.  One wonderful discovery I made today is that PBS is currently allowing visitors to its site to view episodes of Julia Child’s “The French Chef” for free.  Not sure how long it will be available so check it out now here.

4. Public Radio International (PRI): The title says it all.  News programming about world events from all around the world.

Now aside from the internet those of you who are SUPER tech savvy can access NPR and PRI via your iPhone by downloading the free application.  On iTunes you can subscribe for free to podcasts of several of American Public Media’s programs.  WNYC, WBEZ, WBGO and the local affiliates of NPR can be listened to on their respective websites or you can download the streaming audio file into your computers music player.

I was pleased to find out upon moving to Europe to find European equivalents of public radio to satiate my audio appetite.  So far I have found:

Radio Netherlands Worldwide

TSF Jazz

Radio Nova

Radio France

Agence France Presse

GO FORTH AND LISTEN TO GOOD NEWS AND MUSIC PROGRAMMING!

Books SGF Thinks You Should Read

SGF is my good friend, future publisher and Editor Magnificus of Vintage Entity Press.  I am reposting this exercise and book list to expose myself for what I have read (and for what I haven’t) but to also share with you a list of truly amazing titles that will broaden your mind. Thanks SGF!

—

The SGF believes most people will have read only 7 of the 100 books here. How do your reading habits stack up? Have you read more than 7 of these books?

Thanks, Kim.

Instructions: Copy this into your NOTES. Look at the list and put a ‘Yes’ after those you have read. Tag other book nerds. Tag me as well so I can see your responses!

1 Beloved – Toni Morrison -YES
2 The Lord of Dark Things – Hal Bennett – YES
3 Girl, Interrupted – Susannah Kaysen – NO
4 The Outliers – Malcolm Gladwell – NO
5 Just Above My Head – James Baldwin -YES
6 I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings – Maya Angelou – YES
7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte – NO
8 The Diary of Vaslav Nijinsky- Vaslav Nijinsky – NO
9 10 Tongues – Reginald Harris –NO
10 The Odd Brain – Dr. Stephen John -NO
11 KONG & Other Works – Pamela Sneed – YES
12 A New Earth – Eckart Tolle – NO
13 The Stranger- Albert Camus – YES
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare – YES/NO (some not all)
15 Pleasures of the Damned – Charles Burkowski – NO
16 Their Eyes Were Watching God – Zora Neale Huston – YES
17 The Picture of Dorian Gray – Oscar Wilde – NO
18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger – NO
19 Leaving Atlanta – Tayari Jones -NO
20 The Awakening – Kate Chopin – NO
21 Insanity Runs in the Family – Hal Bennett – NO
22 Dutchman and the Slave – LeRoi Jones – YES
23 Prick Up Your Ears – John Lahr – NO
24 Mingus/Mingus – Janet Coleman & Al Young – NO
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams – NO
26 Of Water & The Spirit – Malidoma Patrice Some- NO
27 The Constant Reader – Dorothy Parker – NO
28 Negrophobia – Darius James – NO
29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll – YES
30 Conjuring Black Funk – Herukhuti – NO
31 The Cat That Changed My Life – Bruce Eric Kaplan – NO
32 Venus in Furs – Leopold von Sacher-Masoch – NO
33 Eva’s Man – Gayl Jones – NO
34 Daddy Was a Number Runner – Louise Meriwether – YES
35 Confessions of a Mask – Yukio Mishima – YES
36 Unspeakable – Michael-Christopher – YES
37 Passing for Black – Linda Villarosa NO
38 Jigsaw Eyesore – Barbara DeCesare – NO
39 Sections of an Orange – Anton Nimblett – NO
40 Convincing the Body – Cheryl Boyce-Taylor – YES
41 Traveling Mercies – Anne Lamott – NO
42 Beneath the Underdog – Charles Mingus – NO
43 The Black Woman – Toni Cade Bambara – NO
44 The Virgin Suicides – Jeffrey Eugenides – NO
45 1996 – Gloria Naylor – NO
46 A Paler Shade of White: The History of White People in America, Vol II – Martin Mull and Allen Rucker – NO
47 Home – LeRoi Jones – NO
48 The Women – Hilton Als – NO
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding – YES
50 You Are a Bit Happier than I Am – Tao Lin NO
51 Dark Designs and Visual Culture – Michele Wallace – NO
52 Punish the Sinners – John Saul – NO
53 The End of the Affair -Graham Greene – NO
54 Adventures with Giants – Catharine F. Sellew – NO
55 Go Tell It On the Mountain – James Baldwin – YES
56 Baldwin’s Harlem – Herb Boyd – NO
57 Starborn – John Nelson – NO
58 Volunteer Slavery – Jill Nelson – NO
59 Cemetery Stories – Katherine Ramsland – NO
60 The Entity – Frank De Felitta – NO
61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck – YES
62 Natural Magic – Doreen Valiente – NO
63 Possessing the Secret of Joy – Alice Walker -NO
64 Ceremonies – Essex Hemphill – NO
65 An American Story – Debra Dickerson – NO
66 Nigger – Dick Gregory – NO
67 Hip Hop Matters – S. Craig Watkins – NO
68 The Year of Magical Thinking – Joan Didion – NO
69 Life, Letters and Poetry – Michelangelo – NO
70 Sula – Toni Morrison – YES
71 The Damaged Good – G. Winston James – NO
72 There is a River – Vincent Harding – NO
73 The Days of Good Looks – Cheryl Clarke – NO
74 Interviews with Francis Bacon – Francis Bacon – NO
75 The Long Hard Road Out of Hell – Marilyn Manson – NO
76 Nothin’ Ugly Fly – Marvin K. White – NO
77 The Last Days of Socrates – Plato – NO
78 The Red Badge of Courage – Stephen Crane – NO
79 Women are from Bras, Men are from Penus – Anna Collins and Elliot Sullivan – NO
80 The Palm Wine Drinkard – Amos Tutuola – NO
81 FUNNY – Steven G Fullwood – NO (but soon least my hubby divorce me)
82 Desert Notes – Reflections in the Eye of a Raven – YES
83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker- YES
84 The Prince – Niccolo Machiavelli – YES
85 Where the Apple Falls – Samiya Bashir – YES
86 The Condemnation of Little B – Elaine Brown – YES
87 bloodbeats: vol 1 – Ernest Hardy – YES
88 We a BaddDDD People – Sonia Sanchez – YES
89 Memories, Dreams, Reflections – Carl Jung – YES
90 The Brief History of the Dead – Kevin Brockmeier – YEs
91 Bite Marks – Terence Taylor – YES
92 The Unreasonable Slug -Matt Cook – YES
93 Tales of the Out & The Gone – Amiri Baraka – YES
94 The Low Down Diaries – Eric Ware – YES
95 The Bell Jar – Sylvia Plath – YES
96 If You Can’t Live Without Me, Why Aren’t You Dead Yet? – Cynthia Heimel – YES
97 Spirited – Lisa C. Moore & G. Winston James (eds.) – YES
98 The Medea – Euripides – YES
99 Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret – Judy Blume – Yes
100 Notes of a Hanging Judge – Stanley Crouch – YES

Oddly enough…

…I’ve always been curious about how dry cleaners determine their pricing especially for shirts.  My favorite dry cleaner, Bridgestone Cleaners , located in the Dumbo neighborhood of Brooklyn happens to be one of the few environmentally friendly and conscious cleaners in the borough sent me this email explaining the rationale behind their shirt prices. Additionally they have a special offer for November where you can dry clean 4 sweaters for the price of 3.  I love recession friendly vendors!

 

Cheerio!